Thursday, December 9, 2010

She's a fighter..



I went to see Dr. Cook again today for my weekly appointment. Everything was fine with me as it has been. I've really felt better than i did the first 5 months. Esther has less amniotic fluid in the sack than before, and more fluid in her body. She can't move around much and is working so hard. Her heart is still beating though! She is a fighter! A friend gave me these adorable pink boxing gloves after Brian had mentioned a few weeks back that Esther is fighting for her life. When i opened the gift, i just cried. I love what they represent. It reminds me that she is fighting and it is not her time to go. Even though she looked worse than the last time, it doesn't really change anything. I know that if God wants to heal her, he can and it doesn't have any bearing on how "sick" she is. God raised Jesus from the dead for crying out loud! He has the power to do anything. He spoke and the world came to be. So HE can do anything, can create something out of nothing, and can take fluid out of our baby and heal her if he wants to! I have no doubt. Today i prayed, God please do a fluid switch! Take her fluid from her little body and put it in the sack. He could. I am also aware that he may not, and if that is the case he will give us the grace to walk through that. In the meantime we are still just taking one day at a time. I really wish i lived my life one day at a time before this all happened. I really didn't. It is an amazing thing to wake up each day and just focus on today. I thank God for today, that we are alive that Esther is alive and we have him to be in relationship with and will give us everything we need! He is with us and knows whats in store, who we will talk to, what we will do, so just giving him the day. Things are usually so busy, i would be living today, but thinking about the rest of my week. Not truly living in the moment. I pray that when this part of our journey is over, that i will still live in the present. I don't want to miss anything. This experience has made me depend on Jesus like i never have before, and truly look to him every moment, for every thing. He gives me confidence and hope, and is the foundation in which i can stand firm. We are partnered together as He walks this journey with us. God is good!

3 comments:

  1. After reading this i can just hear Jesus saying, "Well done good & faithful servant." What a beautiful testimony you are to Him. Love you friend!

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  2. I totally agree with the comment above. Could not say it better.

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  3. i thought the same thing as taya!

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